Well yesterday's stupid episode was bad, but it can't compare to today's. Some things transcends bad to be so bad it become infamously bad, even if you've never watched the series or movie it was in. That's what we have today my friends. An episode so lame the writer used a pseudonym on it.
Plot:An alien lady invades the Enterprise and steals Spock's brain. Kirk, McCoy and a landing party beam down to a planet in a desperate race to retrieve it.
Guest Stars:Marj Dusay as Kara
Nitpick:I think show has some potential until we see McCoy beam down with a Spock he can control by remote. How in the name of "Weekend at Bernie's" is that possible?
Summary:
Teaser-The Enterprise is following a vessel that uses ion propulsion which they can't identify. A woman from the vessel appears on the Bridge. When Kirk tries to greet her, she pushes a button that somehow (don't ask how) renders the whole ship unconscious. The woman makes her way over to Spock, and puts her hand on his head.
Act 1-Some time later, the crew wakes up not sure what happened. Kirk goes to check with Spock but finds he is not there. Just then McCoy is on the speaker urgently telling Kirk to get to Sick-Bay right away. When he does, he finds Spock on a bed and apparently on life support. Kirk asks what happened, and McCoy isn't sure. He says that he is worst than dead, his brain is missing. It's been removed surgically. Kirk is determined to find it, but Spock's body can only survive for another 24 hours without it. To make matters worst, McCoy has no idea how to restore a brain it's impossible. Plus, they have no idea where to start looking. On the Bridge, the crew track an ion trail to a nearby system of planets. There are three planets but they are running out of time and must pick one. On one planet Uhura finds energy pulsations leading Kirk to decide to try that one. If he guesses wrong, Spock is dead.
Act 2-A landing party beams down to the planet where large primitive humanoid male's are in the distance. The humanoids attack until the crew uses their phasers to stun one. The humanoid is puzzled, saying that they do not look like the others. The givers of pain and delight. Kirk asks if there are any women but the humanoid doesn't seem to understand what Kirk is talking about. Chekov finds there is a city under the surface, so they need to find a way down. Scotty finds a way, so Kirk contacts the ship and tells McCoy to beam down with Spock. McCoy arrives, with a Spock he can control with remote (no way to un stupid that). They go into the cave and are transported miles under ground. When they stop, the doors open and Kirk stuns a woman at the door. Kirk demands to know where Spock's brain is but the woman has no idea what she is talking about. Kirk uses his communicator and picks up Spock's voice over it. Spock is relieved to hear Kirk's voice. They then see the woman who stole Spock's brain. She immediately renders them unconscious.
Act 3-Kirk, McCoy and Scotty awaken with pain belts on. The woman, Kara, asks what they are doing there. Kirk asks about Spock's brain but Kara has no idea what he is talking about. Kirk asks who controls the place and she recognizes the word, as in controller. Kara says meeting the controller cannot be seen. McCoy says that they just want to talk to someone about Spock's brain. Kara asks if that is the controller, and Kirk realizes yes it is. Somehow Spock's brain is controlling the facilities for the women (sexist? nah). Kirk asks to speak to the controller but he already said that he has come to take him back. Kara uses the pain belts to immobilize them. After Sulu reminds us he is in the episode, the three wake up. They realize that the women can't run the place that is why they need Spock's brain. They get their equipment back and Kirk calls Spock again. Kirk explains what his situation is, and explains that while he appreciates the effort it doesn't seem like they will be able to replace his brain. Especially since his body can't last longer. The three follow Spock's voice into another room where Kara is pondering what to do. When she sees them she activates the belts, but Kirk is able to move Spock's body and get it to release the belts. Kara says the controller can't be removed it will give life to her people for decades to come. Kirk demands to know how she removed the brain, and Kara says she used the teacher. The teacher is a warehouse of vast information from eons and all she has to do is put it on. Kirk forces it on her, and suddenly she is smarter. Smart enough to pull a phaser and prepare to use it.
Act 4-Kara is disarmed in one of the laziest ways I have ever seen. Kara says the knowledge is temporary, and McCoy decides to wear the teacher to get the knowledge to restore Spock. He does, and suddenly it's super easy to do. As McCoy works rapidly, Kara complains that when Spock is restored they will be destroyed. Kirk explains that wont be destroyed they will just have to move to the surface and work with the men rather than use them as slaves. McCoy suddenly starts forgetting, he can't use the teacher a second time, and shoulders on with his own knowledge. He is able to reconnect Spock's vocal center, and Spock walks McCoy through parts of the surgery. Finally, it is over and Spock emerges no worst for wear. As he starts rattling off the information he has learned, McCoy regrets ever reconnecting his mouth.
Final Thoughts: This episode has one good scene. The one at the end of act 1 where the crew are collaborating to figure out where Spock's Brain could have gone. It's great to see everyone contributing. This was needed more on this show. Rather than having Kirk and Spock huddled in a corner while the others were in the background pushing buttons. While the episode has a good start, it just gets sillier and sillier until even the actors themselves don't seem to be taking it seriously anymore. The worst episode? I think a few others are worst, at least it's watchable in a B movie sort of way. Deforest Kelly is really good in this, as if he decided to do everything he could to make this stupid script work. It doesn't.
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