I touched on this in
another article, but decided to get into more detail. The first Superman film
was amazing, just very well done. In fact, in that movie it takes over an hour
to get to really see Superman in action, and yet we don't seem to care. The story
is so well done that we're invested even if the main plot hasn't even come
close to starting. Superman II was the follow up and had lots of problems.
Today I am going to talk about the classic version we all saw in theatres, not
the Donner recut which is actually better. I saw this film in theatres, and
hated it. Well, most of it. This weekend I watched the film again, to see if I
was just being picky when I first saw it. I was very young when this came out.
I admit, I hit the fast forward button a few times. I will be fair and point
out where cut scenes explain my complaints if it applies.
Before I begin let me stress I am not saying the film was
horrible, it's not Superman III or, god forbid, Superman IV bad. I just had a
lot of issues with it. Here are my top 5 :
#5. Pointless Eiffel Tower scene
This is straight up nitpicking because this scene is here
for a reason, just not a reason which serves the main plot of the film except
to get it started. The whole opening of the movie involved a nuclear bomb
attached to an elevator in the Eiffel Tower. Lois sneaks aboard, and to be
fair, this is the one time I like Margot Kidder's Lois. I always preferred Teri
Hatcher, or forgive me even Erica Durance, over her performance in this film. I
don't know, she always seemed a little old and way to whiny. Of course this was
the silver age Lois, so I should give her a break. I did hate that she was a
smoker. Getting off track, the point is Lois is saved by Superman who takes the
elevator into space and lets it explode. The explosion frees the Phantom Zone
prisoners, but originally it wasn't supposed to be the elevator that did that.
It was a nuclear missile from the first movie which was supposed to do that,
which makes the whole Eiffel Tower scene a tacked on moment to get the plot
going, which of course is never mentioned again. Not a bad scene, just
ultimately pointless (and gone from the Donner cut by the way).
#4. Superman does not kill!
This is more nitpicking because it can be explained away.
But again I am taking these complaints from the movie as is presented, not the explanations
from other sources or cut scenes. I love the scene in the end when Superman
defeats the three, the way he outthinks the villains was great. But there is
one problem. The way it was originally presented, it almost looks like the
three get killed. They fall into the ice and vanish, never to be heard from
again! Now if you watch the Donner version you see an extra scene showing the
three being turned over to the authorities, alive and well. WHY WAS THIS CUT
FROM THE OTHER VERSION? It was obviously
filmed, why not use it? The way the scene is it almost seems like Superman
kills the three, which he would never do.
#3. Weird powers
What is it with strange powers the Kryptonians have in this
movie? I say Krytonians because even Superman isn't immune. We see him morph
into his costume in midflight at one point. But Zod walks on water, levitates a
gun and summons it to him, and the three somehow use their vision powers to
change the faces on Mount Rushmore. Yeah, where did these strange powers come
from? Did the creators know that Superman had established powers; you can't
just make stuff up because the effect is either really cool or hard to
accomplish any other way. The biggest problem with powers is, how did Superman
get his powers back anyway? A deleted scene restored in the Donner version
explains it more, and since the scene involved Marlon Brando it was removed.
Fine, but an explanation other than him staring at a magic crystal would have
been nice. We cut from that to him appearing in Metropolis, like nothing
happened. And of course the worst weird power of them all, that damn memory
erasing kiss! Originally the reversing time bit from the end of the first movie
was supposed to be used, but when it got put at the end of the first film they
needed something else to be the reset button. I just wish they had thought it
out, I read that this power was in the comics but that doesn’t help make that
moment make any more sense. Does Lois realize days have passed? What exactly
has she forgotten? Explanation please!
#2.That whole Niagara Falls scene
Now we get to the real problems. I once heard Margot Kidder
herself say their sleeping together was probably a mistake, so who am I to
disagree? Having Clark and Lois sleep together was a big mistake. I complained
about Superman Returns and the fact that in the end Clark and Lois still
weren't together, so I like them as a couple. But seeing them lying in bed was,
wrong somehow. It doesn't help that the scene before it had Superman give up
his powers for Lois. Does that seem right? I realize the chamber is a plot
point for the end of the film, but I don't understand why Lois lets him make
this sacrifice. She fell in love with him because he had powers! Why would she want
him without powers? More than that, why would Superman give up his powers for a
woman who loves him with powers?? I don’t recall a scene were Lois said she
would love him, if he were ordinary and had no powers at all. Now of course the modern version of Superman
would have Lois falling in love with Clark, but this was pre-crisis so I can
overlook that. This worst part is this is all so boring, and contrived by the
way. Why would Perry White send Clark and Lois, his two top reporters, to
Niagara Falls to pose as a married couple for some lame story? The film finally makes Lois have a brain and
figure out Clark is Superman, but why is she suddenly aware of it now? Lois
throws herself into a river to prove it, but Clark goes out of his way to save
her without turning into Superman. This would have been great, and make perfect
sense, if the next scene didn't have Clark reveal he was Superman anyway!! That
river scene is so pointless! It's boring, forced, and ultimately meaningless
because Superman gets his powers back, easily, anyway and the whole thing gets
the magic rewind button treatment in the end.
#1. That damn diner fight
If I hated the Niagara Falls scene, the scene that follows
it almost ruined the whole movie for me. Ok, before everyone comments that this
is an important scene...yes I understand that. But I hated this scene as a kid,
and it still doesn't thrill me as an adult. The setup is simple, Clark has
given up his powers and they wander into a diner. A jerk customer makes a move
on Lois, and attempting to defend her Clark gets his ass handed to him to by
the jerk. Ok, this is where the scene loses me. First of all, why is Clark
acting like wimp? Does he need his powers to be able to defend himself (yes I
know this was pre crisis as I said and Clark was a wimp in that time, but in
this point in the film he should be acting like a capable person). Second, do
we need to see Clark get beaten up like that? Third, after he is beaten like a
wimp we have a bloody Clark watch the TV and finally, and I mean finally!,
realize what was going on with Zod. I get the importance of the scene, Clark
realizes he has been selfish and he belongs to the world and has to go
back...etc etc. I would have done it like this, have Lois proceed to stand up
for herself and beat the jerk. Clark just stands there, realizing how helpless
he is without his powers while Lois has to stand up for herself. Then he
notices the TV and realizes what a mistake he made. Having Clark bloodied just
seem a bit much. This exact kind of thing was also done in Spider-Man 2, and
handled much better. The worst part is the follow up scene. At the end of the
movie, Superman has his powers back. What does he do? He goes to the diner and
gets revenge on the jerk. While the guy deserves his comeuppance, something
about the way the scene is handled feels out of character. Clark goes out of
his way to find this guy and fight him? I would have had him come across him
accidentally, say the guy was robbing a bank or something and Superman stops
him. If this were another film it might have worked, but Clark is Superman he
doesn’t have to prove anything! The way the scene is plays it almost makes
Clark look a jerk in my opinion. I hated that scene as a kid and continue to
hate it to this day.
I did love some of the stuff in this movie. Gene Hackamn was
great as Luthor with some real funny lines, the final fight was really
good...that moment when Superman takes Zod's hand and crushes it always brings
a smile to my face. Overall though, I found this movie to be slow and even
depressing at times. Just not what I want from a Superman movie. Hoping the new
one next summer is finally the Superman movie I have always wanted to see.
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