Top 5 fast forward moments in Good Star Trek Episodes
The other day a video posted from another site regarding
scenes the author hates in movies he otherwise loves. This got me thinking
about those times when a TV show or movie is fine, but there is still something
in it which I find dull. Like in Back to the Future III when I always fast
forward the scenes between Doc and Clara.
Star Trek had lots of these, especially the original series.
I really don't think they knew how to plot a story very well then; a lot of
episodes would have Kirk having a ten minute discussion with a woman which goes
nowhere. Or have Kirk and Spock debating something forever. Here are my choices
for five boring moments in otherwise strong Star Trek episodes (limited to the
original series but including the movies, as you will see in a second).
#5 Star Trek IV
I have said before I love this movie. I have seen it a
hundred times and it is one of my all-time favorite movies. However, there is
one part I always fast forward when I watch this. That's the part at the end,
when the probe and the whales have their discussion. Yes, I am nitpicking and I
do realize there wasn't much they could do about this scene. This is what the
whole movie was leading up to; of course it's going to be played out. But it's
just boring. I have heard the studio wanted Leonard Nimoy to use sub titles for
that scene, and am glad that that idea was nixed. The reason the probe works in
the movie is because it is so mysterious, if we knew too much about it than we
would lose all suspension of disbelief. Boring scene but an important one. By
the way, if you want real boredom read the sequel novel "The Probe".
That is a sure cure for insomnia
#4."Assignment: Earth"
One of my very first articles was on backdoor pilots, and
this was one for a series about Gary Seven. Gene Roddenberry has the Enterprise
in the 1960's for no reason (historical research my foot) and they run into
Gary Seven. The first act feels like a regular Star Trek episode, but then we
follow Mr.Seven as flees down to Earth and we see the backdoor pilot begin. At
first it's still a good episode as Kirk and Spock give chase. However toward
the middle of the show Kirk and Spock follow him to a rocket base and are
quickly captured. They then spend the better half of the end of the episode
standing in a room under guard! They just stand there while Gary Seven shows
off which just gets dull. Finally, and I mean finally, Spock is able to get his
communicator and get Scotty to beam them out. This episode is pretty good, but
as an episode of Star Trek it suffers because Kirk and Spock get pushed away
for the bulk of it and I just can't get invested in the situation. Heck, Scotty
and the crew on the Enterprise almost have more to do at one point! However
Unlike other backdoor pilots this is watchable, but man does it go from
interesting to just plan boring quickly. It is kind of funny to see Teri Garr
so young in this; she was cute in her day.
#3. Shore Leave
This is a fun little episode, one of Trek's first light
hearted fair. Ok it gets a little dark when McCoy is killed, but he's fine in
the end. Basically the crew beams down to a planet where there fondest wishes
and desires come true, problem is they don't know that until the end. Nice of
that care keeper guy to wait so long to reveal himself. "We only know just
realized you did not fully understand what was going on". Really? It took
them that long? I'm betting they were watching the crew and laughing at them
the whole time. Anyway, I am getting off
track. There is a fight scene between Kirk and an old academy nemesis named
Finnegan. The scene starts at the end of act three...and goes into act 4. This
is the longest fight scene in any Trek episode, and it's also really pointless.
We know that Finnegan isn't the real enemy here. There is no suspense, nothing at
stake—and when it’s over the first thing Spock asks is if Kirk enjoyed himself.
Even Spock knows that the whole fight was for nothing! This is just more
padding. This time rather than have
William Shatner make out with someone we see him with his shirt off fighting a
character we just met and don't care about. To be fair, the actor did a great
job playing Finnegan but that doesn't keep this scene from being one long,
pointless filler.
#4 Mirror, Mirror
This is one of my all-time favorite episodes. It is a
brilliant idea executed almost flawlessly. This is one of the few episodes that
I still can't believe was made in the 60's, you could do this show today and
people would say it was very strong. It was written by Jerome Bixby and the
fact a great writer did this is clear (well, he also did Requiem for Methuselah
which is the most god awful boring episode ever, so guess he wasn't perfect).
That being said, what the heck was up with that extended sequence with Marlena
Moreau? I don't object to the character entirely, but that scene in the
captain's quarters grinds the show to a halt and goes on forever! I used to
always fast forward through that. I realize it is important because we learn of
the Tantalus Field, but that whole scene could have been cut down. Of course in
the old days networks dictated a romantic liaison in every episode, so maybe
that's why this is here. Thank goodness Gene Roddenberry did away with that
nonsense when Next Gen came along. A little romance is fine from time to time
if it helps the story in some way (take City on the Edge of Forever for
example, you need that romance stuff in there to appreciate the ending) but
when you start forcing it into every episode it gets boring. Why am I picking
on this episode if it happens all the time? Because here it just stops a great
story full force and that irritates me every time I see this episode.
#1."The Apple"
This episode has one of the dullest moments in any good
episode, but before I explain why let me tell what this show is about if you
never saw it. The Enterprise crew beams down to a planet they think is
paradise, only to discover a humanoid population that serves one function, to
feed and maintain the computer which controls the planet (yes, I left stuff
out). The episode isn't bad, but it isn't great. You watch it and you realize
it's 50% filler. In fact the first fifteen minutes have no effect on the main
story. A red shirt gets killed, we think Spock is killed but he gets right up
after the commercial break, they have a pointless crisis for the Enterprise
which just pads the episode. But the real boring comes toward the end of the
third act, we see Chekov flirting with a yeoman we don't know, care about, or
will see again. Sorry but Walter Koenig is no William Shatner and he just can’t
carry this scene. After this pointlessness two natives who spied the two pawing
each other decide to figure out what the heck they were doing by also touching
each other. Finally the head native interrupts, and informs them the computer
is unhappy. This whole scene is so boring, I don't think I have seen this part
of the episode and not hit the old fast forward button. It just stops the
story, such as it is, for no reason. It's also unnecessary, we already saw the
computer (named Vaal) informing the head native that there was a problem with
the newcomers. This whole scene could be cut and you lose nothing! I might
accept it if romance with Chekov and the yeoman led anywhere, we never see the
yeoman again, thankfully because she whined like a twelve year old during the
whole episode. She was a plot device. Well, Kirk ends up killing the computer
and forcing the natives to fend for themselves. The best part of this episode
is the way it kills of no less than five red shirts. That's pretty good for one
episode. Those poor guys were doomed right from the start.
Of course these are good episodes; some whole episodes can
be kind of dull. I hate Return of the Archons, it is slow and a little
disturbing. But if you really want an entire episode of boredom and
pointlessness I suggest "The Way To Eden", bad doesn't even begin to
describe that one. At least Spock's Brain is fun in a campy, B movie kind of
way,
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