Ah, Christmas! I love watching the great
holiday movies this time of year. The Santa Clause, Home Alone, Miracle
on 34th St, Christmas with the Kranks.....
Wait...what?
Christmas with the Kranks? Really?
Well, yeah. Really. Why is this on my must see list every year? Glad you asked! Let’s take a closer look.
Christmas
with the Kranks is based on the John Grisham book"Skipping Christmas". I
never read the book but have heard that twas a decent read. A lot
better than this so-called adaption. The premise is simple enough. Tim
Allen and Jamie Lee Curtis play Luther and Nora Krank and when their
daughter Blair leaves to go to the peace corps, Luther decides that for
once they will skip Christmas and go on a cruise. Nora is excited about
this idea (at first). Sounds simple enough, so what's the conflict?
There
are two. The first is the fact that The Krank's live in a police state
where they have to conform. Yes I am kidding, but not by as much as you
think. They do live in a very close knit neighborhood where everyone
knows each other and decorating is a neighborhood tradition. Now I can
accept that their friends and neighbors may be disappointed about the
Krank's decision but the way this is written and performed makes the
film go right into the unbelievable category.
Let me
explain by describing this quick scene. Nora runs into the gentleman who
she normally orders her Christmas cards from. She informs him that they
will not be ordering any cards this year. Why they can't at least do
cards is another argument, but the point is that after Nora informs the
guy of this he is seething with anger. He then follows her into a restaurant and tells people about this horrible turn of events. If
this were me I would never order cards from this man again. What business
is it of him anyway? But this is the whole setup for the first part of
the movie. Neighbors, friends, and whoever elsejust appalled that they
dare to go away rather than celebrate Christmas.
It
actually gets worst to. The neighbors start protesting especially when
The Krank's refuse to put up a silly Christmas decoration (that they
already own so it costs them nothing and which the neighbors offer to
putup for them). We see Luther upsetting the local boy scouts, police
department,and even the priest when he catches them at the mall in a
tanning booth. And when some carolers arrive they are stunned to see the
one undecorated house,and proceed to trespass and stalk the place
singing.
Now if you read thebook this was based on there
is a reason for this, sort of. Two simple words that would have made
this movie much more believable: DECORATING CONTEST! In the book the
Krank's not decorating jeopardizes a neighborhood contest, why this would
ever be left of the narrative for the movie baffles me. It wouldn't excuse the neighbor’s actions but it would at least explain it.
Of
course the crazy stuff isn’t confined to the neighbors.Luther and Nora
do some over the top things to. The dumbest moment has to be the scene
where the neighbors are chanting outside their door and Nora panics as
if they are standing out there with grenade guns or something. We get
the contrived tanning booth scene, and a Botox gag that may have been
funny if the film were a few years older. Andre member those pesky
carolers? Luther decides icing the walkway is the best wayto get rid of
them. Ah, the hilarity of watching people fall and kill themselves on
ice.
It is preposterous. It is totally ridiculous and
unbelievable. And that is how I think one has to approach this film. As a
farce, something which only marginally has any basis in what we know as
reality. If you can accept that nothing in this film is meant to be taken
seriously, then you can buy the events we get.
The second
conflict comes when we arrive at Christmas Eve.They have survived the
anger of the neighbors and are getting ready for the trip. Until the
phone rings. Blair calls to say that she is coming home for Christmas,
and on top of that she is bringing her new fiancée with her. Not sure
what why she is in such a hurry to get married, and going so far as
tohave her engaged seems a tad unnecessary (also as a commenters pointed
out in Film Brain’s review of this, what daughter would announce her
engagement to her parents that way?), but this leads into the second
part of the movie. The annual party is suddenly on and Blair is to never
know about their plans to goon a cruise. Why? She wasn't coming home at
all what difference would it make if they told her that they had
canceled the party? Not sure what they are protecting her from, but it
doesn't matter because we have hijinks!
In a panic to get a
party thrown together at the last minute Nora races out to buy a ham
while Luther is supposed to get a tree. I am not sure if those two things
would be the first problem I would address, but it'scool because we get
two totally pointless scenes of slapstick fun as Nora tries to acquire
the ham while Luther attempts to borrow a neighbor's tree. These scenes
are just silly, especially the ham nonsense. I will give this movie
credit for one small thing, when Nora tries inviting people to the party
she finds out, shockingly,that no one is free and everyone they know has
plans.WOW! So this is when they go to the neighbor's, right? Nah we
get more hijinks as Luther tries to put the frosty up all by himself and
almost gets himself killed for his efforts.
Finally the
neighbors become aware of the problem and agree to help. Remember the
credit I gave this movie? I take it back now. NONE OF THESE NEIGHBORS
HAVE PLANS????? Guess not since they all drop what they are doing to
chip in including a lady cooking two turkey's for no apparent reason.Now
in order to make this premise work they had to make Luther into a huge jerk at this point so that we would side with the neighbors. Well, try as
hard as you want I still remember how these "wonderful" neighbors harassed the Kranks for daring to not do what they were expected to do.
Many argue that the fact these neighbors got their way is what spoils the
movie and I can see that. They try to make it clear they are doing this
for Blair, but still in the end The Krank's buckled under and conformed
when the message should be to never be afraid to do what you want. So the neighbors chip in and manage to do work which would take at least a
day in just few hours.
I have to admit, the movie starts
to lose me after this point. Before this I could find the humor in the
absurdity of the premise, but now it starts to get silly. First, two
cops are sent to pick Blair up which is just all sorts of stupid. Second,
everyone who has been in the movie appears at the party. This includes
the priest (what else would he have to do on ChristmasEve?), the girl at
the tanning booth (who knew she was a neighbor), and of course the
carolers which makes no sense since it was clear they had no ideawho the
Krank's even were! Finally, the cops have to stall so they pretend tobe
on the case of a criminal. That is until the stumble onto an actual criminal. For some reason we get this stupid plot point about a
criminal which basically goes nowhere.
And of course we
get more Luther as a jerk because we have to hate him by now, even
though before this scene we didn't really have a reason to. All he wanted
to do was go on a vacation...evil! Why is his idea about going on the
cruise and letting Blair and her fiancée have the house to themselves
such a bad one anyway? It’s not as if they have presents for each other
the next morning, so what’s the difference? I think another flaw in the
film is presenting Blair as a very strong willed, confident adult who
could probably handle the situation if her parents were just honest with
her!!
Yes I am neglecting story #45 about the man
named Marty that no one knows. That is so dumb and tacked on I am not
even going to discuss it.So let's get to the sweet ending which involves
two characters I have not mentioned. One of the many story threads
involves two neighbors, one of whom happens to have cancer. Luther ends
up giving away the tickets to the cruise to the neighbor so they can have
a getaway. He even agrees to watch the cat who he hates. This scene is
as sappy as possible to drive home that this is what the film was
supposed to be all about.Ok, got it. Then the movie ends with Nora and
Luther embracing and realizing how stupid it was to think about skipping
Christmas and doing what they wantedfor a change. It should have ended
with the neighbors apologizing for being such jerks and seeing them off
on their cruise, but who am I to question the writers?
One
positive thing I will say for this movie, it has a heck of a
soundtrack. So that's Christmas with the Kranks. I know John
Grisham wrote the original book but I wonder what he was thinking. This
film makes you think that Christmas is all about decorating your house,
whether you like it or not! Yeah I can see how that could be wrong.
Despite the ridiculous premise,idiotic writing, and over the top
acting...I still like this movie. I wish I could explain why. I get the
criticism and the problems with it, I really do,but I still like it. I
guess we all have to have one guilty pleasure, and at Christmas this is
mine. Could be worst, it could have been Deck The Halls (yech!!)
So that’s mine, what’s yours?
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