An Analytical Episode Guide to:
Season 9, Part 3
Episode 13, Season 9
The Cartoon
Plot Summary-Elaine draws a cartoon for The New Yorker.
George dates a woman with a more than passing resemblance to Jerry. Kramer
takes a vow of silence. Jerry is incorporated into a friends comedy act.
Best Quote-“Alright starting now!”…..Kramer
Nitpick of the episode-What is up with Kramer and his big
mouth in this episode? Sure he has been known to blurt things out before but
here he doesn’t seem to have any idea that he might be crossing the line and
repeating things that Jerry told him is too much
Seinfeldism of the episode-Newman congratulates Sally on
creating a “show that’s actually…about something”
Deleted Scenes- Elaine trying to get credit for the cartoon,
Kramer having trouble with not speaking
Episode Fun Fact-The Jerry story in this episode is based on
actual events when Kathy Griffin incorporated her previous experience on the
show into her act
Final Thoughts-This episode has two major problems. One is
that they decided to keep Kramer quiet for half the episode. That didn’t work
for me, and this is one time his character is boring. To be fair, a lot of the
funny stuff ended up on the cutting room floor. If those scenes had been
included the episode may have worked better. The other problem is George’s
story, which is just unsettling. The notion of him dating a woman who looks
like Jerry is just creepy, and not the least bit funny. Plus we get not just
one, but two scenes of George raging and running out of the room. Great.
Elaine’s story is pretty good, but not great. Why does she care so much about
that dumb cartoon? The highlight of the episode is the story about Sally Weaver
using Jerry in his standup. This is funny, at first. It actually gets old kind
of fast and by the end I am just ready for this one to end. Truth is in the
real world Jerry could have sued Sally and won big for defamation of character,
you just can’t do what she does in this episode and that kind of spoils it.
Grade=C+, a silent Kramer? Fail!
Episode 14, Season 9
The Strongbox
Plot Summary-Kramer acquires a strongbox to keep his
valuables. George’s girlfriend refuses to break up with him. Jerry offends a
neighbor while Elaine dates a poor man.
Best Quote-“Both parties don’t have to consent to a breakup.
It’s not like your launching missles form a submarine and you both have to turn
your keys”…Jerry
Nitpick of the episode-I don’t understand why George’s
girlfriend would want to stay with him when he so clearly isn’t interested in
being with her. The arguments she makes are good if they had been dating for
years, not a few weeks. By the way, what is up with Kramer in this episode? Two
stupid episodes in a row, a shame after all the raving I have done about him
for this season.
Seinfeldism of the episode-Jerry’s cufflinks gives him an in
to strike up a conversation with Jerry Lewis
Deleted Scenes-None for this episode
Episode Fun Fact-They couldn’t even get a little detail like
an apartment number right, since the neighbor has the same apartment as Newman
Final Thoughts-Oh dear lord, not this episode! This is one
of the sloppiest, dumbest, most inane episodes ever! Ok, let’s take this one
story at a time. Elaine’s is really boring. It’s one of those things you forget
two minutes after you watch the episode. The bit with the buzzer is cute. George’s
story, believe it or not, is the only good one. Not only is this a rage-free
George, but the story is almost clever. What would you do if the girl you
wanted to break up with refused? Jerry’s story is lousy, but because it makes
no sense. Are we really supposed to believe he didn’t recognize the neighbor
who lives almost across the hall from him! And was the bird invisible or
something before? Kramer’s story is soooo bad. First he hides the lockbox key
in the dumbest places, did he take his stupid pills before this episode?
Jerry’s jacket pocket??? Jamming it in the buzzer? WTF??? Then it gets worst!
Kramer inadvertently kills the bird that lived across the hall after he ate the
key which Jerry needs to open the lockbox. Problem is they need to get into the
lockbox. What do they do? THEY DESECRATE A PET CEMETARY!!! And the best part is when it turns out the
lockbox was never locked in the first place! Aaargh!! This is beyond dumb; I
can’t even find the words! I am going to stop talking about this now before
this post lasts a whole page. This episode sucks, enough said.
Grade=D+, George’s story is keeping it from being an F
Episode 15, Season 9
The Wizard
Plot Summary-Jerry buys his father an electronic organizer.
Elaine isn’t sure if her boyfriend is black or not. Kramer retires to Florida
and runs for condo president. George likes to Susan’s parents about purchasing
a house in the Hamptons.
Best Quote-“It does other things!”….an exasperated Jerry
Nitpick of the episode-Kramer sells the movie rights to his
coffee table book. Ok……… By the way its nice to see Elaine has learned how to
pick up someone else’s mail. If you recall my rant in “The Visa”, I noted Elaine
not only held Jerry’s mail but never even looked through it. Here we see her looking
through it in his apartment. A small thing but I’ll take it.
Seinfeldism of the episode-Jerry’s father thinks the wizard
is just a tip calculator
Deleted Scenes-A scene with Bob Saccamano Sr.
Episode Fun Fact-Of course wizard electronic organizers are
a real thing
Final Thoughts-Remember the early days when Jerry’s parents
were played like normal, albeit quirky, people? Well it seems like the writers
sure forgot. Exactly when did Helen and Morty become cartoon parodies of
themselves? Maybe I’m being too hard, but this is one episode I don’t like them
in. Ironic since it’s the last one they’re in. But the jokes about the old
people in Florida are just plain tired. I liked George’s story, while George
did not kill Susan directly he sure played a role. I don’t know, I enjoy
watching her parents get a little payback by making him suffer. It’s also an
amazing example of how far George will go to keep a lie going. As for Kramer’s
story, it isn’t bad but it’s not my favorite story of the year. Just because
you move him to Florida doesn’t mean it isn’t the same old Kramer, which is
what this story is. It is an improvement over the last two episodes. It is nice
to see Seinfeld do a race related story, and they do a good job of dealing with
the issue sensitively (at least for this show). That being said, do we really
care about whether or not Elaine’s boyfriend is black or not? And the little
teases were cute at first but get boring.
Grade=B-, could be worst
Episode 16, Season 9
The Burning
Plot Summary-Elaine discovers that Puddy is religious.
Jerry’s girlfriend refers to a mysterious tractor story. George finds himself
doing the work for his boss. Kramer and Mickey perform disease symptoms for med
students.
Best Quote-“Well, I’ve got gonorrhea”…..Kramer in one of the
season’s genuinely funny moments
Nitpick of the episode-It is a little hard to believe at
this point that Elaine had no idea Puddy was religious, and if he is religious
why didn’t he care more that he traumatized the priest in “The Face Painter”
Seinfeldism of the episode-Sophie gives Jerry the “it’s me”
on the phone, Kramer is typecast, George tries to learn showmanship
Deleted Scenes-The weird guy acting as if he his surgeon had
left a sponge in him, George making a quick exit after hitting a fast high note
Episode Fun Fact-Dedicated to the memory of Lloyd Bridges
Final Thoughts-I love this episode! Not only are there
really good jokes in here, but we get a script which does not have George
raging like a loon! You have no idea what a relief this episode is, to have the
George I liked back. Too bad his story isn’t that spectacular, but you can’t
have everything I guess. The showmanship thing just doesn’t go very far though
it is clever. Kramer really makes his story work, and it’s a clever parody on
the typecasting I am sure Michel Richard feared would actually befall him.
Elaine’s story is really good as she discovers Puddy is religious. One of my
favorite lines comes when Elaine asks him what the fact she is not religious
doesn’t bother him. He responds “you’re the one going to hell”. Then we find
out that they would both be going anyway in a clever moment. Jerry’s story is
good to, as he tries to figure out what his girlfriend’s secret is. Four good
stories with actual funny jokes makes for one decent episode.
Grade=A, solid
Episode 17, Season 9
The Bookstore
Plot Summary-Jerry spots Uncle Leo shoplifting at a
bookstore. George can’t get rid of a book he took into the bathroom with him.
Elaine has a fake relationship with a co-worker. Kramer and Newman start a
rickshaw business.
Best Quote-“We made out at the table like our plane was
going down”…Elaine
Nitpick of the episode-Yeah, if I knew where that book had
been I wouldn’t want to lay hands on it either
Seinfeldism of the episode-George’s book has been flagged
Deleted Scenes-Elaine hearing about her new office rep
Episode Fun Fact-First episode since season 4 to have music
rather than a final scene over the closing credits
Final Thoughts-The teaser is very unique, as we see Kramer
doing all sorts of things in, and to, Jerry’s apartment (including riding that
famous bike that always hung in the background). This bit felt like the writers
knew it was the last few episodes and decided to have some fun. Funny but also
a tad contrived. As for the episode, it seems like every episode has to have a
weak story. This time its Elaine’s turn. The whole thing about her having a
fake boyfriend just feels flat. We barely even meet the guy and the story feels
like it’s over before it’s begun. Uncle Leo gets one last appearance and its
good, including a clever Cape Fear parody. Unfortunately it’s almost more Leo’s
story than Jerry’s which kind of sucks. The rickshaw story is silly, but
somehow it works. That final scene with Newman rolling down the steep hill is a
very clever moment obviously filmed in downtown LA. Although having him run
into Elaine’s fake boyfriend is a tad forced. I don’t think anyone would defend
George in this one, but its funny watching him determined to get rid of that
book somehow.
Grade=B, ok
Episode 18, Season 9
The Frogger
Plot Summary-George’s purchases a Frogger machine so his
high school will live forever. Elaine eats an antique piece of cake owned by
Peterman. Kramer makes use of police caution tape. Jerry dates a sentence
finsher.
Best Quote-“Game Over”…..Jerry
Nitpick of the episode-I think George should have looked at
the big picture. Why not just purchases the machine and bring it home, and he
can play it all he wants? Why fixate on a silly high score? Isn’t the machine
the source of the good time he had those years ago? Also what are the chances
that score is still there anyway, even if no one had beaten the score are we
supposed to believe the pizza place never lost power once in all that time? And
I’m not even going to mention that the arcade version of the game doesn’t allow
people to input their initials, it just displays high scores.
Seinfeldism of the episode-Jerry complains his girlfriend is
a sentence finisher, saying it’s like dating Mad Libs. Very glad to see
Entenmanns’s get a mention in a Seinfeld episode, what took so long?
Deleted Scenes- There was a whole story about Kramer and a
girl he liked which ended up on the cutting room floor
Episode Fun Fact-Jason Alexander did his own stunt in the
final scene of this episode
Final Thoughts-Yeah, I kind of like this episode. The whole
thing with The Frogger is silly but somehow it works. I used to love to play
that game so I got a kick out of that final scene. Elaine’s story is funny to,
and for once one of her stories has an actual ending as Peterman points out how
much of a mistake it will be that she ate such an old cake. Kramer’s story is
kind of weak, but as I noted the deleted scenes include a big chunk of story he
was supposed to have. So, I can forgive it if it seems like he gets a little
shortchanged here. The whole thing about the serial killer is lame, and
probably the one weak part of the episode. Jerry’s story is bland to, but that
sequence where he is breaking up with Lisi is really clever so I will let it
go. This episode is silly, but the silliness doesn’t seem to be so crazy that
it spoils the show.
Grade=B+, in many ways I consider this the final good
episode of Seinfeld. I will discuss why next week as I look at the final three
episodes including the overhyped, and very disappointing, finale.
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